Most American women feel like they need to lose weight. Almost all of us have our issues with it. I've mentioned that mine are mainly health related at this point and that I had been putting off starting a blog until I lost weight.
Fortunately I'm beyond beating myself up over the body image issues. Dr. Kvetch (DH) loves me, I love me, and that's all that matters on that front. However, I have about 20 pounds to lose. It's not an arbitrary number and not one that will make me uber skinny. It's the number that gets me to a BMI of 24.9.
I weighed about 15 pounds more than this for a long time after giving birth to my son. In 2008, Dr. Kvetch and I did Weight Watchers together. At my lowest weight during WW I was about eight pounds less than I am now. I'm just over 5'3" (and I'm old enough that now the doc measures my height at check ups). At this height, five pounds still makes a difference in how I look. I had a change in one of my medications that is really making weight loss a struggle.
I'm not going to WW meetings anymore. Other than the weigh ins, I find the meetings don't help much if one is already confident and assertive. Right now I'm not following WW online either because I'm focusing on some specific issues with my diet. (I'm using Fitday). All of that is for another post. But I still follow some of the WW philosophies.
One of these philosophies is to get rid of all of your "fat" clothes when you lose weight so that you can't slide and let the weight pile back on. I did this, first getting rid of 14s and then 12s and size larges. At my lowest I fit in all 10s comfortably and some 8s in skirts. I realize with vanity sizing the 10s of my college days would now probably be 6s today.
So if my clothes, especially pants, look tight, that's why. It's supposed to be a sign to get back on track. I carry weight most in my stomach, but you can also see it in my face.
My current weight status conflicts with one of my fashion goals of buying quality over quantity. I'm not going to shell out the bucks for quality until I'm at my goal weight. I've restrained myself from the J Crew pencil skirts on sale. No designer jeans yet. The best bras will have to wait. Most of my wardrobe is lower end right now. I do still try to pick out items of decent quality and construction. I buy on sale and on ebay, and I doubt that will ever change. I will admit to rebuying a few pants in size 12 to get me through. But I'm hoping to fit into my 10s comfortably this fall.
You'll see whether I make any progress. Where are you on your weight journey?
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I have similar body issues. My weight distributes mostly evenly over my body with an emphasis in the midsection. Although I take med for my sluggish thyroid, I'm not convinced it helps, and I've considered discontinuing it despite my doc's advice. A 20lb weight loss would put me at my ideal weight. At this point I'd be thrilled to lose even 10. I would be hesitant to purchase $200 jeans even at my ideal weight, but I still buy the clothes I like. I'm just always thinking that I would look better in them if i lost 10 or 20lbs. I tried blogging for about a year and never posted irl pics for that reason. Now I see your blog, think you look great, and find your confidence inspiring. Looking forward to future posts.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for your kind comment. I'm hypo too...please don't discontinue your meds, maybe discuss w/your doc switching to something different.
ReplyDeleteIt remains to be seen whether I would really invest even at my goal weight. I've worked hard to ditch my sale goggles and only buy what is flattering. But I have always been a bargain shopper. I'm reminded of the What Not To Wear episode where they gave the woman "permission" to shop at the front of the store (ie not just the sale racks in the back.)
Actually designer jeans probably wouldn't be my first purchase; a Diane von Furstenberg wrap dress, that would be a different story.
I think you should celebrate where you are and buy a few investment pieces. It's where you are now. Be ok with that. I was a 2 for the longest time. When I hit 4 I kept buying cheap pants. I finally invested in some RL pants for about $100 each and they've gotten me thru my fluctuation of 5-8 lbs because they're well made. I'm currently a 6 and can still fit into those pants. I've had a lot of health issues in this last year and just accepting myself and what my body is doing brings peace. At least I can control what I wear, even if I can't always make my body do what I want it to do. Maybe when you're more accepting of where you are, it'll be easier to move closer to where you want to be. $0.02.
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